i wandered into SUCH a funky used book store recently. i found myself standing in front of the psychology section. ahhhhh…
grabbed a book by rollo may. i recognized his name. have loved some quotes by the guy. but didn’t know anything about him or what he wrote.
flipped thru the book last nite and was loving what i was reading. nodding and feeling fueled all over the place. turns out he’s a humanistic psychologist. and that seems to be the stuff that resonates with me. who knew?
two great points i got outta it so far – well, one is what he sees as the whole goal of life. why start small, here? let’s go right to it! – “…one’s goal is to live each moment with freedom, honesty and responsibility. One is then in each moment fulfilling so far as he can his own nature and his evolutionary task.’ (he defines and explains what he means by freedom and such thru out the book.)
i’m thinking a sloopy way of saying it is see yourself clearly and live authentically. more or less. i’m so in.
another thing i was totally captivated with was the idea that eternity transcends time! when i read that i think ‘OF COURSE IT DOES!! why didn’t i ever think of that?!’ and i know! what the heck does that mean?! here, check this out –
“Eternity is not a given quantity of time: it transcends time. Eternity is the qualitative significance of time. One doesn’t have to identify the experience of listening to music with the theological meaning of eternity to realize that in music – or in love, or in any work which proceeds from one’s inner integrity – that the ‘eternal’ is a way of relating to life, not a succession of tomorrows.”
thud. this stuff just knocks me over.
my whole day is inspired here! so thought i’d share……
i put up a podcast today. i’m reading something to both you and ME! it’s a writing i found describing a moment where i experienced the feeling that everything can truly be held in a moment. the good and the bad.
it was a huge big deal to me. and i wrote about it.
and then…yeah…i did what i seem to do –
i forgot about it!
was so delighted to find this. wanted to share. was holding a friend in mind as i read it.
i’ve been doin’ some thinking today. about what matters.
then my friend who is also an art cohort called. it wasn’t unexpected. we had some business stuff to figure out. but i wasn’t quite ready to hop into that. i paused. ‘i’ve got some stuff on my mind today. can i just tell you?’ ‘yep’ he answered.
just like that. and without pause, i launched in. pushing it all out there in front of us and then leaning back with a pause. waiting. i’ve learned to give him a nice stretch of quiet and wait for his answer. and so i did. and sure enough, there he was.
he brought up a book he had read. i smiled. he’s speaking to me in my kinda language. which, of course, is why i can blurt it all out to him.
this entire exchange is gold. and it wasn’t lost on me. the friendship, the work involved to getting to where we are now, the respect, the sincere pondering, the sharing, the just plain caring.
i sat looking out my living room window at the trees in the wind as i listened to what he had to offer. holding the moment.
the people in our lives that will listen and offer – i am treasuring them today. so much so.
and nudging all of us to let those people know. they are what matters.
there’s a rumi poem with a line about coming to a place where everything is music.
that line has been really on my mind the last couple days.
for me, it feels like it means something about getting old enough to realize that life is so darn full of the ‘good’ and the ‘bad.’ and maybe wisdom is understanding that it is ALL music – not just the good – but the ALL.
is that what he meant? i went over to the poem to see. i don’t think so. but i don’t care. right now that’s what it means for me. and i’m guessin’ he’d be okay with that.
turns out i could use that thought today.
i will probably write more about why that is later on. for now, i wanted to offer this to anyone in a spot where this might resonate.
if the ‘all’ is feeling so overwhelming right now, please know you are not alone. close your eyes and see if you can hear the music.
he called to check in and see how i was. ‘i’m right in the middle of what feels like a spiritual experience,’ i tell him.
this is what happens when you marry an artist.
thing is, it was really big for me. and probably a little too complicated and personal to type out here in any kinda form that will work.
but here’s part of it in a general, ‘for public use’ form –
it’s the whole honesty/see yourself clearly stuff i’ve been talkin’ about the last couple days.
i saw a big place where i wasn’t living my belief. ha! i mean, seriously?!
yep! and my eyes got wide and i thought ‘okay, terri, what the heck is it you really believe?’ and when i answered i then went to – ‘well, then! why the heck aren’t you living it?!’
and i re-calibrated. oooh…i sound like my GPS thing. that’s it! it’s like that! you get to driving in the wrong direction, and you gotta go re-calibrate! and this time, instead of getting mad at myself for going the wrong way, i’m so excited that i figured it out and turned around to find the right way again!
maybe that’s just the way it works. and instead of focusing on the wrong turns that i’m always gonna be taking, maybe i just need to know that when i do find my way, it’s a really really good thing.
it’s the first day of spring today. and i feel like i landed in it with gusto today. re-calibrated gusto.
this honesty/seeing clearly stuff? my gosh, it matters.
honesty is hard. i used to think it was easy. something that i just basically was.
i should know better. since i think it involves looking at ourselves over and over again, and seeing places where we’re not really being honest with ourselves, or maybe places we’ve changed and haven’t yet realized it – it takes some work. just as i was thinking about this, someone posted this image up on instagram. i grinned. apparently i have been pondering this all before.
wanted to share it here in case anyone else is pondering…
didn’t think it’d be so hard to get back in the swing of my dreams. i mean, i used to be incredibly good at working with them. but ahem…
then i stopped. and it’s been hard to find my way back.
finally, finally i feel like i’m making some progress.
last nite’s gave me this gem –
be intentional about what you let into your thinking. pay more attention. be stronger in your focus and your boundaries. if you want to travel where you want to, terri, then you need to really keep an eye on this.
i am quite thrilled about this. i needed the message. and i find the conveying of it absolutely brilliant!
here’s to the brilliance of dreams and the lucky moments when we can hear some of that brilliance!