well that helped!

well, for someone who is fairly aware
of the inner child inside her –
i sure didn’t see the inner teen tuggin’
on my sleeve lately!

i just haven’t been right.
and yeah, sure,
there’s a lot goin’ on that would make a person
not exactly right.
i know that.
but still…
i usually dive in and figure out what exactly
isn’t feeling right and work there.
and i was tryin’.

but i wasn’t touching on something.
and i could feel that.

it was a total accident that landed me
in a place where i realized –
there is a certain part of me that really needed
to feel safe.
my inner teen???
go figure.
i mean, right?
just go figure.

when i was a teenager,
when things weren’t right for me and i needed
to center and just feel better, i would go into my room
and listen to neil diamond.
i sheepishly posted this on facebook yesterday.
i mean, i’d really like it to be some cooler music
that i could claim i got lost in.

years later, i have tried to listen to neil,
but it just wasn’t my thing anymore.
which is fine. i just figured i outgrew it.

so why on earth i ended up popping him on
while i was exercising, i have no idea.
i like to believe i was being led.
maybe my inner teen finally grabbed the moment.

whatever it was,
i popped him on and exercised and sang along.
and i started to notice something –
i was feeling better.

REALLY feeling better.
i mean, more better than could be explained by
exercising (tho i’m sure that helps!)
but more in a deep soothing way.

and i could go right back to my room inside my head.
i remembered being in there and feeling so very similar.
and i could feel something inside me melting – in a good way.

i have been thinking about it ever since.
and wanted to put it out here.
i try to remind people often to pay attention to their
inner kid inside them. i don’t think i have ever said
pay attention to your inner teen!
well, um…….pay attention to all of your inners, right?!
and if one of them is tuggin’ on your sleeve letting
you know they’re not okay, maybe see if you can do
something that might feel good to that part.

here’s the thing tho –
i don’t think i woulda known it was my inner teen.
i just found her by accident.
but maybe we can just pay a little more attention to
things that we are led to. and maybe that’s how we can
find some of this stuff inside us?

don’t know,
but wanted to mention all this.
cause…well…..it’s a freaky funky time!

and today? after yesterday’s session with neil?
i feel soooo much better.
and i feel like i can stand tall and do what i want to do.
and that feels really really good.

high fivin’ my teen!