tis the season

i wrote something to a friend the other day that has been stuck in my mind ever since.

she’s struggling. and i got to thinking that if you’re gonna have a struggle, maybe this is really a good time to have it.

you know how we wish we weren’t blue during the holidays? and we want to be all merry and bright? well, let’s face it, we always want to be all merry and bright. that’d be nice. but if there’s going to be a hard period, maybe the holidays are perfect.

i can hear you thinking, ‘terri! what’s wrong with you??’

but i’m serious.
of course this would all depend on what the holidays mean to you. THAT matters. this only works if there’s some sort of deeper meaning to them. so yeah, if it’s just a time to gather with friends and parties and such, well, okay, it’d suck to be blue now. so i’ll buy that. BUT if the holiday has some sorta deeper meaning, maybe it’s a good time to go to that meaning and hang on to it.

i recently heard from two friends in one day that were going thru horrendous ordeals. oh man. what a time for all this, i thought. and then! i thought about it again and thought – yeah! WHAT a time for all this!

it’s a time to hang on to the idea of there being light in the dark even when you can’t see it. it’s a time to remember that you believe in something bigger than you. it’s a time to believe there’s magic out there somewhere. it’s a time to light a candle and just sit with the light and be in the stillness. it’s a time to gather with a friend or two and share your struggle. it’s a time to believe things can change.

maybe this holiday season is totally about sitting in the darkness and looking for the light.

it’s just so easy to forget as we get told it’s about being all merry and bright. whether you feel it or not.

this season is getting deeper and deeper for me as i grow older. and yeah, so much of it is about believing in the light. even when we can’t see it. for all those who are deeply struggling right now, i am holding you in my heart. and you are with me each time i light a candle.

“Maybe it’s not about the darkness.
And maybe it’s not about the light.
Maybe it’s about the knowing.
The knowing there is sacred always.
Even when you can’t see it.
Maybe it’s the knowing that’s the holy part.”