and that’s okay…

i got a lesson this morning
in what may seem a bit of
a strange way…
okay, in a TOTALLY strange way.

when i went to sleep last nite,
i set my alarm nice and early.
i had some stuff i wanted to attend to on my walk.

i planned to get into a good conversation
with my imaginary friends and gain some
much needed insights.

i ended up having one heck of an incredibly distracted,
unfocused, fuzzy headed time.

i did manage to call out a couple of my imaginary friends
that i rely on for direction.
but i couldn’t stick with them long enough to get any.
my mind kept darting in and out.
listening wasn’t happening.

and they were perfectly okay with that.
they didn’t need me to ‘get’ anything.
they would be there when i was ready.
there was no judgment or need on their part.

okay.
to be clear.
i know this sounds nuts.
that is not lost on me.
what i’ve come to know tho, is that this method works for me.
i gain a lot from these talks that i have with myself.

this time, tho, i gained something from not being able to hear –
the whole ‘perfectly okay’ thing i felt from ‘the other side’ of me.

total acceptance.

THAT part i noticed.
i thought about how i needed to give both myself
and those around me a lot more of that.

the not needing anything and the complete trusting the process –
that lit up my walk and my heart.

and i could see – fuzzy – yet still there –
that this goes with my thought from yesterday.
it goes with the desire to ‘partner with the universe.’
trusting the process without needs or judgments is gonna be
such a huge part of everything.
i want to learn to do this more and more.

and here i was – watching my imaginary friends do this with me.
they inspired me today.
EVEN when i wasn’t listening!
or maybe BECAUSE i wasn’t.

go figure.